Worst Jokes Ever

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Herring Memes

MEME LORD

A still from a video, showing a cartoon character with cat ears and two figures in red plastic costumes. The text on the image reads: "A Queen's strength comes from her King."

原田

A two-panel image. The top panel shows two cartoon characters with swords. The text above the left character is, "The worst she can say is 'No'." The text above the right character is, "The worst she can say is 'Ew'". The bottom panel shows a close-up image of a cartoon mouse with a nervous expression, and the text, "*Screenshot*" below him.

Heroin Monkey

The image consists of two panels side by side. The left panel shows a woman holding a rifle with the text: "DIDN'T KILL THE MAN WHO TORTURED AND KILLED HER FATHER, BECAUSE 'REVENGE IS BAD'". The right panel shows the video game character Kirby with the text: "KILLED THE GODS BECAUSE SOMEONE STOLE HIS CAKE".

Heroin Monkey

The image is a two-panel comic. The first panel shows a man advising another man to say to a woman: "You're an 8 on a scale of 10." The second panel shows the man instead saying to the woman: "Urinate on a skeleton."

Heroin Monkey

The image shows a green cartoon character with red eyes. Below the image is text of a story about a date gone wrong, ending with the line "That's my story of how I got cockblocked by motherfucking al qaeda."

MEME LORD

A man with a sweaty face looking exhausted. The text on the image is: "When u RAW DOGGIN her for 3 hours straight with back to back rounds & she stops *sighs* & says 'Do u think they'll ever find a cure for AIDS?'"

Heroin Monkey

A woman is lying in bed looking annoyed. Next to her is a giant egg. The text above the image reads: "Her: he's probably thinking about other girls... Him: I am egg". There is a Twitter account name of @DennysDiner above the text.

Hollow Knight Beater

Hollow Knight Meme

The image shows eight characters from Hollow Knight, each with a short description of their personality. The characters are "knight", "git gud", "corn", "cloth", "(s)quirrell", "tissue", "zote THE MIGHTY", and "mr mushroom".

DADDY sus aka the king

when your gf invites you to her house to chill😏

A red-tinted image with a scary anime girl with cracked face in a school-like setting.

COOL GIRL😜

her

A tabby cat is lying on a gray couch. The cat is looking at the camera with a slightly grumpy expression.

Anonymous

💖💖💖💖💖

The image is a text exchange between a dad and someone else. The dad asks "Are you treating my little princess ok?" The other person replies: "Sir...your little princess has anger issues and throws hands like an inmate. Yes. Things are fantastic."

Heroin Monkey

A still from Sesame Street shows Ernie and Bert standing next to a snowman. In the bottom of the image, overlaid on a black background, are the words: "You can still hear her heart beat!" Ernie said. It wasn't until spring that the hooker's dead body would show up on the playground.

Anonymous

Damn.....

The image contains text that says: "Her boobs are saggy without a bra." and ur dick is small without an erection. NEXT

Chungus

Are you a tater or a hater

A man is talking and the text says, "Then grip her up by the her neck. Tate's opinion on how to handle a girl."

Harpersphone

C A S T O R here is proof the names are marked out for privacy

The image shows a text message conversation where someone asks "Well will you be my gf?" and is labeled as ME. Another person responds "What do you think?" and is labeled as Her. The person labeled ME responds with "Idk", followed by a "mhm" from Her.

Chexers

W BOBBYYYYYYYY

A cartoon image shows Bobby sitting at a table with a huge steak in front of him. He is cutting the steak with a knife and about to take a bite. The text on the image says: "Never forget the time Bobby got his heart broken by a vegetarian; and then - while looking her in the eye - demolished a 72 ounce steak in front of her. This act of spite was truly an inspiration."

Sooploosh MacSchnibble

homuratrash:
guy at disney: sir? stitch, a small logic defying blue alien from outer fucking
space, needs a heterosexual romance
disney ceo: okay....but we gotta know she's Female, do u understand?
....she needs long antennae..like long hair..mascara...smooth chest that
sticks out a little more because we need to be reminded that she still got
titties even tho she's a tiny fucking alien
guy at disney: should we make her pink, sir?
disney ceo: ricky you goddamn genius. here are my keys. go to my house
and fuck my wife

Heroin Monkey

A close-up image of a monstrous-looking dog with large teeth and a harness on its face. The text overlaid on the bottom of the image reads: 'pitbull owners be like "her name is pancake and she's a sweetheart."'

Heroin Monkey

A screenshot of a tumblr post showing three separate comments. The first post says "Learned today that my ex-husband buys his weed from a lesbian dominatrix that banned him from DJing at her sex club because he kept playing his version of 'Lean on Me' made entirely of samples of Homer saying 'd'oh'." The second comment says "AMAZING". The third comment says "Every word in that sentence is better than the last".

Heroin Monkey

FEBRUARY
Saturday
Right, I know it's been a while since I wrote in this,
but a whole lot has happened so let me fill you in on
everything.
Manny Heffley is the personification of human sin. Do
you wanna know the reason he tried to get me killed?
DATS FOWR NAWT
TEACHING ME HOW
TWO TIE MY SHOES,
YOU FUCKING PLOOPY.
I'M ONWEE
THWEE, BUBBY!
HEWP ME TIE MY
GAWDDAYUM
SHOES.
So I punted that little shit into the wall..
I should have paid more attention to Miom though, because
she actually stuck by her word for once. She managed to
shoot me in both legs and break i
my.
fucking kneecaps.
11

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