Handlebar jokes
What do a bike and a rubber duck have in common? They both have a handlebar, except for the duck.
Baby: Stroll?
Me: *puts baby in stroller* WE'RE GOING ON A STROLL!
Baby: *happily screams*
Stroller: *front wheels break off*
Me: WE'RE GOING ON A STROLL WITH NO FRONT WHEELS!
Baby: Oka- CRASH!
Bro, you ever think while driving the moped why they call it a footrest when the foot never lets it rest? The foot is working harder than the engine. You push, push, but still go the same speed like a turtle with a bad mood during a rabbit race...
What is the same with a duck and a bicycle? The handlebars--oh, except for the duck.
Who can shave 20 times a day and still have a beard? -- A barber.
Children should never run with scissors, and lesbians should never scissor with the runs.
You can tell a lot about a woman's mood just by her hands. For example, if she's holding a gun, she's probably angry.
Why doesn't Barbie ever get pregnant? Because Ken comes in a different box!
If you're gonna razor yourself, you might as well have shaving cream.