Handicapped Person jokes

I lost a race with a handicapped person today. The problem was the race was all stairs.

Gravity sure is fast.

A conman, a mentally handicapped person, and a Russian spy walk into a bar.

And the bartender asks, "What will it be, Mr. President?"

A handicapped person was making fun of me, so I walked away.

A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."

Trump should be grateful for DEI.

How else could a mentally handicapped person be elected President?

What's the difference between a wanted person and a wanted handicapped person? The handicapped person wasn’t last seen on foot.

A handicapped person tells a good joke, but he can't be a stand up comedian.

I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

This girl told me people call her ugly because she is disabled. I told her to stand up for herself.

I used to get pushed and called lazy in school.

Man, I loved that wheelchair.

I met a guy in a wheelchair today. His face was battered and bruised. "What happened to your face?" I asked.

"I'm a Paralympian," he replied.

"Boxing?"

"No, ... hurdles."

Ever since I needed a wheelchair, my husband has been so rude. He’s been pushing me around and talking behind my back.