Fluffy jokes

God creating cats.

GOD: Make the most fluffy cute thing you can think of.

ANGEL: Ok.......................................anything else?

GOD: YES, PUT RAZOR BLADES ON ITS FEET!!!!!!!!

A woman decides to take a well-earned vacation, and she asks her brother to watch her cat while she's away.

On the second day, when she calls her brother to see how things are going, he tells her bluntly that the cat is dead.

The woman is really upset and goes into hysterics, before saying, "You can't tell a person bad news so bluntly. You should break the news gently. The first day, you should have said that Fluffy was stuck on the roof and couldn't get down. The second day, you could have said that she had fallen, but the vet said she would be okay. Then on the third day, you could have said that she died from complications."

The next day, the woman calls her brother again and asks how things are. He says, "Well, Grandma is stuck on the roof and can't get down..."

What do you call a sheep with no legs?

A cloud.

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

What's pink and rusty? Madeline McCann's bike.

What would you name your pet rabbit?

Harry.

This is a joke about Ms. Ploopatoink, a made-up character who is a pink fluffy pony who loves toilet paper.

Why is Ms. Ploopatoink like a toilet plunger?

They both jump in the toilet!

Where does cotton candy come from? The cotton pickers!

What is white and fluffy? A peelo.

You're so much like a marshmallow, you're so squishy and sticky, and everyone puts their sticks inside of you.

What's pink and fluffy?

Pink fluff.

Yesterday in my dream I ate a ten pound marshmallow, when I woke up, my pillow was gone.

Fat chicks be like, "Am I fox pretty, bunny pretty, cat pretty, or deer pretty?" Like none, bitch, you elephant pretty. 😭😭😭

Roses are red, pussies are wet, when it goes in he gets upset. She said it's too small, so that's all. But later that day, he wanted to say, "Every time I play, no one complains, so she was just lying." She started flying, went out of her seat, the skirt went up, the greatest of them all. Everyone said, "Fly away big chunky balls."

Why do you call a fat midget?

Jiggly Puff.