DoS jokes
What TV shows do orphans not like?
"Family Guy."
How do you call a black pilot?
A pilot, you racist.
What do tofu and a dildo have in common? They're both meat substitutes.
What do you call a man who can fly? A flying man.
Little Johnny and his dad were going to buy a horse.
Dad: Rubbing on the horse’s chest and butt.
Little Johnny: What are you doing?
Dad: Checking to see if the horse is healthy so I can buy it.
Little Johnny: Oh well, I think the mall man wants to buy mom.
What is a doe called with no legs?
•" No legged deer."
What do you call a deer with no ears?
•" No eared deer."
What do you call a deer with no eye?
•" No eye deer."
XDDDDDD
What do you call a food fight that's been going on for years?
A war of nutrition.
How do you get your grass to cut itself?
Make it depressed.
A robber held up a depressed kid at gun point.
The depressed kid took the gun, and said, "I'll do it myself."
Imagine you go to school, right? You hit the curve, the bus driver be like, "Ahhh, how do I stop the bus?" Students from the bus jump from the windows. One of the students: "That's a YOU problem."
What do you say to a girl with no arms and no legs? Nice boobs!
Why do orphans like the game Adopt Me? Because they've never been adopted in their life.
What do you tell twins that are in love with each other?
Go fuck yourselves!
What do you tell twins who are in love with each other?
Go fuck yourself!
What do Miss Reeves and Michael Jackson have in common?
They both have a touchy feeling for kids.
In Alabama... How do you know your sister is having periods? Your dad's penis tastes like blood.
Do you know how to make a plumber cry?
Kill his family.
How do you call a virgin girl in Alabama? An orphan.
How do you organize a rave party in Ethiopia? Just put some bread on the ceiling.
There is a rich child and a poor child. The rich child invites the poor child to his house and shows him all the toys and tells him: "Look at what a beautiful radio-controlled airplane I have! You don't have it because you are poor!" The poor child answers: "You're right, it's very nice, but I have one thing that you don't have!" The rich child then invites him into the garden and shows him the swimming pool, the trampoline, and all the other games that can be done outdoors and says to the poor child: "Look at that beautiful swimming pool I have! It is very big; you don't have it because you are poor!" And the poor child says: "Beautiful, it is really beautiful! But one thing that you don't have." So the rich child feels bad. He says: "Wait, but I'm rich! How is it possible? I have everything I want because I'm rich. Why do you have something that I don't have?" And the poor child says: "I have cancer!"