DoS jokes
Why couldn't an eagle do a barrel roll? It's oblivious, it's il-eagle.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell them to clap till their parents come home.
A son tells his father, "I have an imaginary girlfriend."
The father sighs and says, "You know, you could do better."
"Thanks Dad," the son says.
The father shakes his head and goes, "I was talking to your girlfriend."
How do you get 4 gay guys on a bar stool? You turn it upside down.
How do you get them back off again? You jerk them off.
I don't struggle with self-harm, I do it everyday.
Why do people like dating us emo girls? Because of the texture on our thighs.
What do you call an orphan if every other orphan gets picked?
Someone: Ugly?
Me: No, trick question, they are still an orphan.
Do you know why pedos get away with molesting orphans? Who are they gonna tell? Not their parents.
What do 9-11 and a fighter have in common? They both have a one-two combo.
What do Call of Duty players say when they shoot up a school?
654-721-8940
(If you understand the joke, you're a god.)
How do two emo kids greet each other?
"I like ya cut, G."
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope.
Why do kids like Michael Jackson so much?
Because he's made out of plastic, and that's what toys are made out of! 😂
What do Michael Jackson and Tesco carrier bags have in common? They’re both made out of plastic and harmful to children.
What do Michael Jackson and Pinocchio have in common?
They both lie over little boys 😂
How do you enter your house?
Through Bill Gates!
Q: What do you say when Trump is still president during 2020? A: Magic!
Go up to someone and say, "I'm sorry for your loss," and see what they do.
My mum once told me, "How do you spell Mississippi?" and I said, "Misisipi." But she said, "No, it goes mi-ss-i-ss-pp-i," and I laughed when she said "pp." Then she said, "Why are you laughing?" I tried saying, "You said pp," but I was laughing too hard.
Bad joke: Why is it easy to bully orphans? Because what are they going to do, tell their parents?