DoS jokes
Why do orphans only have 363 days in a year?
Friend: Why?
Me: Because they don't have a mother or father's day.
Why do orphans eat their cereal with water?
Their dad never came with the milk.
Q. What do filicide jokes and filicide victims have in common?
A. They never get old.
What do you call a hungry person?
African.
Why do orphans can't play baseball? They don't know where home is.
Why do orphans not like July 24th??
Because it's Parents Day.
What do you call a disabled person that can walk?
Enabled.
Why do all orphans have an iPhone X?
Because it doesn't have a home button.
What do you call an orphan's family photo?
A selfie.
After arriving home from helping the priest, a young altar boy approaches his parents, "Mommy, Daddy, my poop is white!"
The mother rushes the boy to the hospital, while the father rushes to church in a rage and proceeds to beat the living hell out of the priest. Afterwards, the father heads to the hospital and meets his wife in the waiting room; she's surprisingly calm.
"How can you be so relaxed after what that bastard has been doing to our son?" he exclaims.
The wife looks up at him, "What are you talking about? It's just a liver infection!"
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Because they actually come back.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
They can't see their parents.
A young peasant coming from the field with his scythe on his shoulder notices an attractive young woman that was doing the laundry in a mountain stream, perched on some rocks near a waterfall.
The guy stops and leans against his scythe, fascinated by the young girl's beauty.
After minutes of watching her, she loses her balance, slips on a rock and falls all the way down, crushing her head on the white rocks.
Thoughtful, he puts his scythe back on his shoulder and walks away, saying to himself "Damn, another washing machine destroyed by limestone!"
What do you call a flying Aboriginal?
Boong 747.
What do McDonald's and priests have in common?
They both shove their meat into 10-year-old buns.
What do you call a Chinese man with one leg? Tie one shoe.
What do you call an orphan in a wheelchair running into fire?
Hot wheels.
What do you call an orphan who grows up to become a priest?
Father Les.
What do my wife and dinner have in common? They are both vegetables.
What do emos and the Lorax have in common?
They both hang with trees.