Delivery room jokes

A woman goes into labor with her child. The doctor says that they have invented a new device to transfer the pain of childbirth to the father. He asks if it is okay to use the new device. The couple agrees, and so he turns the pain to the father to 10%. The man feels nothing. They then bump it up to 20%. He still feels nothing. They keep doing this until they have the machine up to 100%. The man still felt nothing so they go home happy, until they find the milkman dead on the porch.

So, Satan is in the delivery room having a child.

Soon, a feathered creature comes out. "Doctor," says Satan, "What is it?"

The doctor sighs. "Well, it's not a boy, and it's not a girl."

Satan looks frustrated. "THEN WHAT IS IT?!?!?"

The doctor looks up. "It's a goose."

Your forehead is so big that your mom stayed in the delivery room just to give birth to your head.

Your forehead is so big your mum spent an extra hour in the birth delivery room.

Any joke can be funny with the right delivery. Except abortion jokes, because there is no delivery.

What is the easiest line to draw in the hospital?

My heartbeat.

Woman: "Doctor, where are we going?"

Doctor: "To the morgue."

Woman: "I'm not dead yet, doctor."

Doctor: "We're not at the morgue yet, either."

How do you throw a surprise party at a hospital?

Bring a strobe light into the epilepsy ward.