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Ultimate Ass-Getter

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So you get more ass than me, huh?

And how exactly am I supposed to do THAT

I’ll be the arbiter of this

Go into a public area and see how much attention you get from the women

Looking forward to the results

I just went to my nearby Starbucks

I ordered a latte, and while waiting for them to make it, I made eye contact with EVERY woman in the room

Not a single one avoided my gaze, they all looked MESMERIZED by me

Some blushed, some smiled, and a few even GRINDED UP against me out of pure instinct

But now you have to pass the real test

Take a walk down the street, and see how many women check you out or even say hello to you

I am currently walking down the street right now and I will report my findings live

As I’m walking down the street, I see heads turning as we speak

Women of all ages are CLEARLY checking me out

I’m even catching some women stealing glances

Several females are giving me warm 'Hellos' as I pass by

They’re also batting their eyelashes smiling

YOOOOO a few are even stopping me to ask for my number

I see you're not messing around

There’s one final test though

This will be a true test of charm and magnetism

I want you to try your luck in a night club

And see how far you get with the ladies

Report back with your findings

Ok I’m at the night club giving a live report ok

I see females dancing and having fun and quite a few are already staring in my direction

Some coquettes are coming up to me to chat as we speak hold on

They’re sending UNMISTAKABLE signals my way

Nobody can resist the charm of the world’s most eligible ass-grabbin, cheek-snatchin, booty-smackin bachelor

So far things are progressing nicely

I’v been invited to fuck several women

Like it seems like every turn there’s a new female grinding on pro

It’s like having a PERSONAL FAN CLUB

You realize you’re WASTING MY TIME BRO

I’M LITERALLY THANOS WITH THE LADIES BRO I DON’T NEED YO AHH

REALITY IS WHATEVER I WANT I CAN GET ANYTHING I CAN ACHIEVE ANYTHING I SET MY MIND ON AAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!

You’re literally wasting your time here

I can just stop responding to you for a couple of hours, and your world will be in complete chaos

I dictate the game, and you’re just another LOSER who thought they had a shot

You never did, and you never will

I won’t apologize when my actions hurt you either

If you’re offended then YOU’RE the problem

Being offended is a weak position anyway

You should be more like ME instead

I’ll get you trained, little puppy

You’ll follow all my orders and as long as you behave you’ll get pats on the head

If you’re good I’ll even feed you

Maybe I’ll even take you on a walk too

You better not make a mess on the carpet though

That gets you locked in the kennel

Your little attempts are cute

But when you grow up and become as successful as me, you’ll understand that the world doesn’t care if you think you’re hot shit in your head

It only cares about results

You see, there are two kinds of people in this world

Those who make things happen, and those who watch things happen

Guess which one you are?

As if I already don’t know the answer

Ah, it’s this guy again

BOOTY$MACKA

Where did you spawn from?

a hole

opal opal

Ah, it’s this guy again

we just met ?

I guess the average IQ of the room has risen ever so slightly

opal opal

I guess the average IQ of the room has risen ever so slightly

It’ll raise like my dick if YOU LEAVE

You like facts huh? Is that it? You like those sweet, truthful cold hard facts?

Then bring me concrete, indisputable evidence of your success with the ladies