Cloak jokes

Why don't witches wear underwear?

So they can get a better grip on their broom.

Why did Severus Snape cross the road wearing an invisibility cloak?

So no one would know what side he was on.

Harry Potter has an invisibility cloak, I have family.

I was Gandalf the Grey.

But now, after just three washes...

What's the difference between you and me? You're not strangling a man with a cloak on.

I was given an invisibility cloak by my grandfather, but it was stolen in 2013. After investigating this issue, I have come to the conclusion it was Robert Lewandisney.

That's why he was invisible in every big game since 2013. SHAME ON YOU LEWANDISNEY!

To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket, "You can hide but you can't run."

Ever heard of the show "Naked and Afraid"? That's what I call hide-and-seek with my uncle.

To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket... You can hide, but you can't run.

Friend: Hey, wanna play hide and seek? Me: Sure, I've got a great spot! Me: *grabs knife and runs to my closet*

I've never worn my gay sweater, it hasn't come out of the closet yet.