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Are jokes

My boss doctor said that we are getting a surgeon coming in tomorrow. I'm super excited to work with him. The next day, we had to do our first-ever open heart surgery, so me and the surgeon spent many hours on this patient. We finished the surgery and went outside for a smoke, and we were talking. I said, "Why did you keep the patient's blood on your glove?"

He replied, "We in my free time I test it for anything diseases, HIV." The next day, I got invited to his house, and we had some drinks. I said, "This is amazing red tea. What is in it?" Just the 2000 people you have cut open.

See, this is the best thing about no such thing as vampires because I'd be the first person to say drinks are on me.

Three boys are in the 4th grade; one is black, one is white, and the other is Hispanic. Who has the biggest penis?

The black one... he's 13!

If I like having sex and get with 15 people, are they getting sexified?

Man: *steals drink*

Boy: bro😭😭

Man: Why are u crying over a drink?

Boy: That had drugs.

Man: ....

Your earlobes are so big, you can fit your mom inside of them 5000 times and still have room for more!

Genders are like the Twin Towers.

There used to be 2 of them, but now it’s a sensitive subject.

He sang a love song to a rat, yet stans are befuddled on why people keep calling their idol "Wacko Jacko".

I was walking down the street and saw a kid and I said, "Are you an orphan?"

He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"

I said, "Your parents at first."

My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...

So I threw a coconut at her.

If you text your crush and they leave you on read, just know that "read" has four letters. You know what also has four letters? "Mine." So that basically means that you are theirs. :)