Chuck Norris was a kamikaze pilot. 12 times.
A priest asks the convicted murderer at the electric chair, "Any last requests?" "Yes," replied the murderer, "Will you please hold my hand?"
[God creating spiders] God: make it have 8 legs Angel: ok? bit excessive but ok God: and 8 eyes Angel: You need to calm down and li- God: give it a butt rope
What did Hitler say after his parents bought a hauler
How much did the haulla-cost
What did the hiroshima survivor say about the day little boy dropped? It was a blast
why did hitler never go to a strip club? he hated the poles
My grief counsellor died today. He did such a great job. I don't even care
Q:What did the elephant say to the naked man?
A:How do you breathe through that little thing?
Man walks up to a priest. The man says "I am Jesus Christ." The priest says "No you are not my son." The man says " Follow me." The man walks into the bar and the bartender says "Jesus Christ your back!"
I’m a family doctor and I wish I could help but... you’re an orphan
you call it a tragedy. I call it a 25 killstreak.
whats one thing gay people can't draw? a straight line.
(This is a fucked up pick up line) are you a building? Because I rate you 9/11
If I make a summer camp for kids with concentration problems will it be a Concentration Camp?
Broccoli is like anal sex.
If you're forced to have it as a child, you probably won't like it as an adult.
2 friends are talking and the one says, "I had a good day today, I ran into my ex." The other guy replies, "How is that good?" The Friend says, "I was in my car."
What's Michael Jackson's favourite thing to do on guitar? Fingering A minor
As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing.
Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.
What's the difference between apples and orphans? Apples actually get picked.
I made a website for orphans, but sadly it didn't have a home page.
I was very lonely so I bought some shares. -- It's nice to have a bit of company.
