If I was a party, then anxiety must be the cousin depression felt obligated to bring to the party and insomnia the little annoying sibling.
Why is Santa's sack so big?
He only comes once a year
They named road after george floyd it was a dead end though
I was in the corner shop and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead, I scratched it off and won a fucking ford focus!
My friend called me a dick earlier. I said you are what you eat. He then proceeded to run away from me.
I have a joke about time travel, but I'm not gonna share it. You guys didn't like it.
what does Stephen hawking have in common with a bull ? they both charge
what do you call a depressed emo ,dead
Wacko Jacko bleached his skin, lit his head on fire, slept in a chamber, abused his pet monkey, built an amusement park on his own backyard, had toys as decor for his home, slept with little boys, raped little boys. Jacko was Florida Man before Florida Man.
Hellen keller picked up a cheese grater, it was the most violent story she'd ever read.
Yo mama is so fat when she got on the scale it said one at a time please.
so i was sitting on the couch with a woman,and i asked her,does this napkin smell like chloroform?
How much of a homophobic heterosexual man are you? I'm so homophobic I won't suck a big dick that has ketchup on it
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
What did the kid with no arms get for Christmas? A pair of gloves! Nah, I’m not that mean, he’s still trying to open his presents.
After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "What are you going to do now?"
God said, "I think I'm going to call it a day."
I was in school yesterday and I saw this emo kid with a new cut so I said, "I like ya cut g." And I slapped him. I don't know why I got in so much trouble. All I did was slap his wrist.
What is killing your friend called? a homie-side
I have just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman. It's very rewarding, but quite challenging. -- Took me ages to get her husband's voice right.
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman?
Snowballs.
