Aed jokes
Q: What’s Homer Simpson’s least favorite style of beer? A: Flanders Red Ale.
You are so blind, even a spider can see better than you.
Why is the fat man roping himself to the side of a mountain?
So he doesn't roll back down!
What should you do if you meet a giant? Use big words.
My pansexual son was asked to form a sentence with a word "Carry" on his zoom class earlier on today and he said "Pessi was carried by Iniesta and Neymar to his Mickey Mouse UCL". He received a standing ovation. Children are our hope and I'm proud of the education system!
One day a son and his grandad were smoking.
Too bad only the sun was smoking. :)
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
Once I was in South Korea doing stand up comedy... and I started with a "hidden" joke and I said: "I'm so happy to be here in one of the most beautiful Korea's in the world..." which is a good joke but they didn't get it, and they looked at me badly... so I said "I'm here in the South which is more beautiful... South good, North booooooo." But still nothing, they kept glaring at me... then I realized that maybe I was in the wrong Korea.
Yo mamma so poor that when we went on a date, she took off her shoe laces and said "spaghetti."
What's a rapper's favorite insect?
Rhy-mosquito.
Every bad joke can become a good joke with a good delivery, but abortion jokes, they have no delivery.
Same old boring ass day, until a person with Parkinson's fainted and got everyone's attention.
He really shook things up today.
I did a walk today, but it was good for me and my car. And a walk today.
What do ya call a group of emo kids hanging from a tree? Ornaments.
What’s the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?
The mosquito stops sucking after you slap it.
Which nut has won the World Cup the most times? A Brazil nut.
Madden Whiffen, a curious soul, With an appetite beyond control, A bottomless pit, never satisfied, Ingesting all that's placed beside.
From dawn till dusk, he feasts his way, Devouring meals without delay, With gusto he consumes, without restrain, Every morsel, every crumb, he'll obtain.
No dish too large, no portion too small, His hunger insatiable, devouring it all, From succulent meats to delicate greens, He relishes the flavors, savoring each scene.
A culinary adventure, forever he embarks, Sampling cuisines from all walks and arcs, From street food to gourmet, he seeks it all, His palate an explorer, on a constant sprawl.
He savors the spices, the textures, the taste, In a gastronomic journey, no time to waste, For Madden Whiffen, the food is his muse, A symphony of flavors, he'll never refuse.
But caution, dear friends, in this feeding spree, For gluttony can lead to a troublesome plea, Madden Whiffen, beware the consequences, For overindulgence brings no recompenses.
In the realm of cuisine, he reigns supreme, A legend of eating, a man of extreme, Madden Whiffen, the one who eats it all, In his gastronomic pursuit, he stands tall.
So let us marvel at his voracious might, As he devours dishes, day and night, For in Madden Whiffen, we witness the feat, A man who eats everything, a culinary elite.
What’s the difference between a boomerang and an orphan's parents?
One of the two actually came back.😂
Hey! Some idiot drew a cat on this pillar! Wait... does that make it a caterpillar?
I got to work.
Ben: Oh no, my boss is here. I hate my job and I'm terrified of my boss.
Ben: Uh, hey, hey Mr. Boss.
Boss: Have a nice day.
Ben: Ok, bye!
Boss:??