I conducted a survey. I asked 100 woman what kind of shampoo they used while they were in the shower? 98 of them said how the fuck did you get in here? đđđ
19. Itâs important to establish a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words âantidoteâ and âanecdote,â one of my best friends would still be alive.
Q. Whatâs white, sticky, and better to spit than to swallow?
A. Toothpaste.
What's a depressed person's least favorite type of cereal???
LIFE
Are you a grave, 'cause I want you on me
What do you call a piece of tech that acts emo
Cutting-edge Technology
I Didn't know that COVID 19 was a thing until i saw your eyebrows and your hairline social distancing
What happened to the blind man's son. He thought he was hitting a pinyata.
What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common? - Their balls are just for decoration.
A wife and husband was setting up their computer and the husband makes the password my dick, but the wife fell on the floor laughing because the computer said the password was too short.
Teacher: Johnny can you use a sentence with definitely in it Little Johnny: Do farts have lumps in them Teacher: of cause not Johnny Little Johnny: then Iâve definitely shat myself
What do you call it when a midget waves at you? A microwave
Today I learned humans eat more bananas than monkeys. -- I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.
Why was the guitar teacher arrested?
For fingering a minor.
if i hung myself from a cliff would people call me a cliffhanger?
How to tell if your depressed? You came to a website called worst jokes ever . com looking for a quick smile.
It must be not a good suicide story if you can tell it.
so i was on the phone with a scam caller, he said he knew where i lived and would kill my children and wife jokes on him i already did.
I tried to get my bloood sucked by a vampire, but he said I was too empty inside
what do you call a ice skating dwarf?
a midget spinner
