Aed jokes

Gays: "I like men."

Straight: "I like women."

Bisexual: "A hole is a hole."

A man walks into a bar. He takes a seat and asks the barman if he wanted to hear a blonde joke. The barman replies, "Before you tell this joke, I want to tell you something. See the woman over there? She is a black belt in karate, she's blonde. See the bouncer over there? He is also a blonde. See the chick over there with that pool cue? She is also blonde. Also, I have a shotgun behind the bar. I'm blonde. So do you still want to tell your joke?" He replies, "F**k that. I ain't explaining the joke 4 times."

What do you call a blind dinosaur? Do-you-think-he-saurus.

Why can a gay man give a better brojob to a heterosexual man than another heterosexual man?

Experience.

Woah man, you need to take a step back. Your hairline did, so I am sure you can.

What kind of experience does a feminist have?

Being a bitch.

Heterosexual sodomy is like religion. If you were forced to accept it when you were younger, you probably would not like it when you become an adult.

Why is Donald Trump so jealous of Usain Bolt?

Because he successfully finished a race!

if you ask an artist how to commit suicide, they will say a very creative way

If a woman sleeps with 10 men she's a slut, but if a man does it... He's gay, definitely gay.

There's a movie about constipation. It hasn't come out yet.

A brother and a sister always got into fights. One day the brother tells the sister, "You're adopted!" The sister yells back, "At least they wanted me!"

Friend #1: "Yo guys, what's the most unfair game you've ever played? For me it's Fortnite."

Friend #2: "I'd have to say Monopoly."

Me: "The most unfair game you say? Life, definitely. Like, no one wins, it's a one-way game."

Friend #2: "Uhh...that's not exactly what he meant..."

Friend #1: *calls the suicide hotline*

A little boy and a little girl are taking a bath together. The little girl looks down at the boy and says, "Can I touch it?" The little boy looks back at her and says, "Hell no, you already broke yours off!"

Chuck Norris would have died a couple of years ago, but death hasn't built up the courage to tell him.

So, I went out to eat the other day, and the waitress came up to me and asked if I wanted a glass of water. I said, "Yes ma'am." She said, "Oh honey, you don't have to call me ma'am, I'm not that old." I said, "Okay, thanks bitch."

Suicidal people are a big contributor to the rope making industry.

Fatty and Skinny were in a bed.

Fatty rolled over, and Skinny was dead.

If you jump off a bridge while crying, it's suicide, but if you jump off a bridge while screaming "parkour," it's a failed stunt.

Circumcision is like getting your dick sucked by a female. If you did not like it when you were a teenager, you probably will not like it when you become an adult.