what happens when the president turns emo? the great depression
Shower thoughts
What is the best way to kill a special ed kid?
Call them retarded.
I was in the corner shop to buy some lottery tickets, and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
How do you throw a surprise party at the hospital?
Throw a strobe light in the epileptic ward.
My 19-year-old girl killed a butterfly. I said no butter for you.
She then she killed a cockroach. I told her nice try.
Where does a black Eskimo live?
In a Nigglu.
My girlfriend told me her lips were dry, and she had the audacity to get mad at me for telling her to walk.
What did Chris Brown say the first time he saw Rihanna?
I’d hit that.
How are Asians like a box of chocolates? Either way they’ll kill your dog
My woman is a nine on a bad day, but she’ll be 10 on her birthday.
Sparkling water was invented by Germans. Who else would add gas?
Why do Black people not like country music?
Because every time they hear "hoedown," they think their sister got shot.
What is the worst part about siblings having sex?
Being left out.
I used to date this girl only to find out she's a guy.
I guess you can say she had me in a trans.
If Kamala Harris is Indian, why doesn’t she have that dot on her head?
So she claims to be.
And the only black color I know is when you shut off the lights.
What’s the opposite of Stephen Hawking? Stephen walking.
Yesterday during the storm, there was a blackout, so I shot him.
Why is Christianity the most dramatic religion?
Because other religions say, "Do, do, do."
But Christianity says, "Done, done, done!"
I heard P. Diddy got a job as a defensive coordinator.
He’s used to penetrating aggressively.
What song did Michael Jackson come up with after his first sleepover with the kid?
"Just Beat It."