Worst Jokes Ever
One way to not pick up a girl is to say, “Are you an American school because I wanna shoot kids into you?” I tried it on a girl, and she is now terrified to come near me.
How was I supposed to know she was already pregnant?
Why don't Indians play baseball?
Every time they reach a corner, they make a shop.
What’s better than winning a gold medal at the Special Olympics?
Not being retarded.
There are too many suicidal people in this world. I’m going to make sure there is at least one less.
"What’s your name, son?" the principal asked his student. The kid replied, “D-d-d-dav-dav-david, sir.” "Do you have a stutter?" the principal asked. The student answered, “No sir, my dad has a stutter but the guy who registered my name was a real jerk.”
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Bill Cosby.
Bill Cosby who?
Never mind, I’ll come back when you’re sleeping.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Little boy blue.
Little boy blue who?
Michael Jackson.
What do a 14-year-old pregnant girl and the child inside her have in common?
Both are thinking, “Oh no! My mom’s gonna kill me!”
I've thought about suicide, but there's always been a part of me that knows I wouldn't be able to live with the decision.
What’s worse than ants in your pants?
Uncles.
Your mama is so skinny that when she went to go outside, the slightest breeze flew her all the way to New Mexico.
"Ayo, Lynx, where you at?"
I am an Indian joke.
Life is better without my dad annoying me (him smacking me, screaming for something useless, limiting my screen time, and much more).
A blind woman tells her boyfriend that she’s seeing someone. It’s either terrible news or great news.
I was playing chess with my friend and he said, "Let’s make this interesting."
So we stopped playing chess.
Man: Doctor, where are you taking me?
Doctor: To the morgue.
Man: But I’m not dead yet.
Doctor: Are we there yet?
Why did the egg hide? It was a little chicken!
Patient: Oh, doctor, I’m just so nervous. This is my first operation.
Doctor: Don’t worry. Mine too.
You're so scary that even your hairline ran away.