Did you hear that Rushdie has a new book? It's titled "Buddha, that Fat Fuck."
Worst Jokes Ever
What is the difference between a baseball player and an orphan?
The baseball player has a home to run back to.
Yo life got no meaning, just like your dad when he left. Like if it's a good one.
In the cute fantasies: "Est-ce que tu manges du poulet? Attendez une seconde, VOTRE PROFESSEUR VEGAN!!!!!"
In reality: "Are you eating chicken? Wait a second, YOUR THE VEGAN TEACHER!!!"
Bully says, "You are DISGUSTING!!!!!!"
The girl says, "Just like your face."
Your forehead is damn big, Walt was jealous of you.
A Japanese person comes to America and sees guns everywhere. One American says, "Welcome to America!"
Little Johnny walks into the living room and asks his parents, "Mom, Dad, what do you get when you crossbreed a bulldog and shih tzu?"
The mother and father shrug and say, "We have no idea, Johnny. What do you get?" and little Johnny replies, "You get a bullshit."
Why can't orphans play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
Why couldn't your mom make you dinner? Because she's dead!
Couldn't be me being an orphan.
Why were 7, 8, and 10 scared?
Answer: 9/11, of course!
When your little brother knocks your two Jenga towers you made with his toy airplane,
You: "Hey, stop trying to recreate the Twin Towers!"
People say that biting off your finger would be as easy as biting a carrot if your brain didn't try to stop you. How the f do people know that and how many people's fingers did they bite off before coming to that conclusion?
Simplest way to tell if dogs are better than cats: My dog is named Curiosity, and your cat is dead.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They can’t find home.
Roses are red, violets are blue, at the end of the day, you're gay.
"Do you have a noose?"
"Nose?"
"Yeah, noose- nose... I heard yours was stuffed lately--haha."
"I actually smell something--like a corpse. Is it you?"
"No."
*Dying on the inside has never been so detectable.*
What is 6 inches and has nuts?
A Snickers bar.
Who even needs white jokes?
