Worst Jokes Ever
Me: The last time I used Duolingo was when the dinosaurs went extinct.
Duolingo: Lemme send my twins 2 go 2 ur houze (I got sideways8 twins)
I got kicked out of the library because I put the woman's right book in the non-fiction section.
A boy in nursery asked a girl out. She ran away crying in fear, so he just went back to teaching.
The only difference between my grandma and the Twin Towers is that they collapsed faster than my grandma.
What do you call an autistic army special forces?
Lynching is just another word for "hanging around."
Pregnant teen: I'm pregnant, my mum's gonna kill me.
Unborn baby: My mum's gonna kill me.
Why do orphans like boomerangs so much?
Because they come back.
Why did the orphan like to jump? So they can jump off a bridge to be reunited with their parents.
1 like = 10 more orphans in my basement.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they can’t find home base.
Are suicide bombers taught properly how to fly, or...
Are they just given a quick crash course?
When I was in middle school, I was kidnapped by a terrorist organization.
Al-gebra.
I have more respect for cancer than depression, because cancer has the balls to kill me himself.
Do trees pee?
How else do we have No. 1 pencils?
My entire family "TAKE THIS GIRL TO AN ASYLUM!!!"
Me "OH NO" 💀
Why don’t Asians get stung by bees?
Because they are always expected to get “A’s.”
Want to know how to fit 71 people in a car? Two in the front while we handle 69 in the back.
What is the difference between me and a fire?
It's hot.
What do rocks and girls have in common?
The flat ones get skipped.
What do you call a blind German? Someone who can't Nazi!
A Chinese couple had a black baby and named it Sum Ting Wong.