Worst Jokes Ever
Someone: PLEASE EAT! I DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE!
Me: *Trying to remember how long it would take me to die of starvation because I've already googled it and given up because it takes too long.*
Me: Na, yeah, I still have 19 days left.
What did the toaster say to the bread?
"I want you inside me!"
I just
How many emos does it take to change a lightbulb?
None, because they just sit and cry in the dark.
What did one orphan say to another orphan?
"Get in the Batmobile, Robin!"
Why do the orphans eat their cereal with water?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
Did you know that the letter "f" in "orphan" stands for family?
Bro used the quadratic formula to calculate the velocity of your -234 going down hairline.
How do you know someone is autistic?
They get stuck in a loop very often.
How do you know you've found a priest? When little Timmy is glued to his crotch.
People are pushing for a Black Statue Of Liberty coin.
Can't wait to use Black people as currency again :)
Teacher: "What is the opposite of the following sentence: 'Children in the dark make mistakes'?"
Student: "Mistakes in the dark make children."
Why did the orphan turn gay?
A: Because he wanted someone to call him "daddy."
You know why I only date disabled people? Cause they can't get away.
Why does Mao Zedong like the east coast?
Because there is a red Sun in the sky.
My friend in a wheelchair is autistic and tried to fight me, so I said: "If you wanna fight me, I'll run up the stairs, and by the time you get up the stairs, I'll already be down the stairs waiting," and he started crying.
What is the difference between an orphan and a TV?
One has more channels.
A priest, a minister, and a rabbit walk into a blood bank.
The rabbit says, "I think I'm a type-O."
The twin towers are like your father, they're both gone and will never come back.
Whatβs the difference between a photocopier and the flu?
One makes facsimiles; the other makes sick families.