Worst Jokes Ever

Are you a blanket? Because I love it when you’re on top of me.

Did you make your bed this morning? Wanna unmake it together?

You need a good place to think? You can sit on my lap, and we’ll see the first thing that pops up!

You must be ice cream because I wanna lick you up.

Are you feeling down? Because I’d happily feel you up.

Is your name winter? Because you’ll be cumming soon.

Don’t have a bike? You can mount me instead.

You’re so fine that my zipper is falling for you.

Why don't you have a life?

Because you're ugly.

Ugh... I hate Anons so much, they're annoying as fuck.

What does the word circumcise mean?

Cut off a boy's or a man's dick, or cut off a girl's or a woman's foreskin.

You’ve got something on your face. Wait, no, it’s just missing something. My dick.

Your mom's been giving me attitude lately, so I told her to shut her mouth. When she did, it caused me to lose 4 inches.

Are you an archaeologist? Because I’ve got a bone for you to examine.

Do you have a shovel? Because I'm digging that ass.

Are you a raisin? Because you’re raisin' my dick.

The FBI wants to steal my penis. Can I hide it inside you?

They say that the tongue is the strongest muscle in the human body. Wanna fight? 👅💦

Are you a pirate? Because I have a lot of seamen waiting for you 😉

Let's play carpenter. First, we'll get hammered, then I'll nail you.