Vance jokes

You gotta give it to JD Vance. He is consistent; he is Putin his dick where it don't belong!

Well, somebody has to cushion the blow.

Why does JD Vance have strained diplomatic relations with Turkey?

He took away their ottoman!

Why does JD Vance not need a conviction?

His running mate has 34 of them!

Manly men go to strip clubs. JD Vance goes to IKEA.

How did the Shaggy defense become successful for JD Vance?

He was not banging on the sofa. Rather, he was banging the sofa!

Today I gave a blind guy a gun and told him it was a hair dryer. Since I have no fingerprints, the police said it was suicide. I guess you can say I took care of him!

How many times does 43 go into 8?

Get in the van and find out.

How many times can 50 fit into 9?

Get in a van and find out.

I hate this. Everybody knows it's how I roll, if you jump into my van you get a Tootsie Roll. My uncle said this...

Your dad never needed a van for you.

My name is Dan, I wear white Vans, I have a gun, get in the van!