The jokes
Why do orphans eat dry cereal for breakfast?
They're still waiting for their dad to come back with the milk.
Fun fact: The max comments on a joke on this website is 1000! (LINK IN COMMENTS FOR PROOF)
If you can't stand the heat, sit!
The Demon when it gets summoned to earth only to find out it was a spelling mistake in Latin class. 😬
Someone who was working in the tower must've put their phone on plane mode.
According to a recent poll, your mother said, "I like the guy who saw the guy who doesn't have a brain!"
Why doesn't the orphan have a nationality?
He doesn't have a motherland.
What did one iceberg say to the other iceberg as the Titanic went by?
"I'd smash that."
A guy stole my car last night. Before dialing 911 I thought, "Fuck it. Let him explain the dead bodies in the trunk."
Why can't Chinese people play baseball?
Because they eat the bat.
What is the difference between an apple spread and an orphan spread?
Apples get picked.
Why do midgets giggle when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
What is a necrophile's least favorite game?
The Walking Dead.
Why did your daddy not come back with the milk?
Because you have no dad because your dad never loved you.
I was in class doing sex education. We were learning about sexual stereotypes.
My teacher turns to the class and asks, "If anyone could tell him what a sexual stereotype was?"
So I raised my hand and said, "Asians have small penis." He looked at me and said, "Very good, but I was looking for a definition."
The best way to tell someone that you don't like them is by texting them "370HSSV 0773H" and tell them to read it upside down.
BF: Babe, I have two questions.
GF: Ok, ask!
BF: Where have you been all my life?
GF: Aww, that's so sweet. And the second question?
BF: Can you please go back there?
GF: What do you think of our love?
BF: Count the stars in the sky.
GF: Aww... It's infinity!
BF: Nope. It's just a waste of time.
I tried phone sex once. But the holes were too small.
I was gonna make a joke about Mexicans but honestly, it crosses the line.