The jokes
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite band?
The Rolling Stones.
So a girl says to her ex, "I can't get you out of my mind, the boyfriend I knew." The girl replies, "I see you in everything, like when I'm walking down the street, even at work, like trash cans are everywhere."
Your mumma so fat she takes up 4 seats of the sofa.
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and ten 6-year-olds?
I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
When you're exercising and you feel the “gush.”
What do you call a cringey Indian man? A Cringian.
Sorry, the joke is bad :(
I wanted to visit my pet fish, but it was hard to sea it through the darkness.
A man walks into a bar and orders 3 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down?"
The man says, "I just found out my niece is gay." The next day, he orders 4 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down now?" The man says, "I just found out my son is gay."
The next day, he orders 6 shots of whiskey. The bartender says, "Got anybody who likes women?" The man says, "My wife does."
How do you help a constipated person?
You scare the shit out of them!
How do you catch a polar bear?
Cut a hole in the ice, put peas around it, when the polar bear goes to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole.
When meeting her parents doesn't require you to leave the house.
What did the roti say to pratha?
You white like a white bastard.
Why did the Indian cross the road?
To get to the curry shop.
What did the Indian person say to the lady?
"Curry up, will you?"
Why did the guy like retarded jokes? Because he was a retard himself.
Why did the chicken cross the plane to get to the other skyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy lloooooooooooooooooooool?
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Did you hear about the elephant with no nose?! Me neither.
Why did Susie fall off the swing?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Susie.
I worked at a calendar factory, but I got the sack for taking a few days off!