So jokes

Last week a girl asked me for sex. I had to disappoint her... so I said yes.

Someone asked me to go to hell, so I drove to my local middle school.

Why did the orphan go to church?

So he could call someone Father.

Yo mama so fat that when she walked past the TV, you missed three episodes of your favorite show.

Hairline so big people had to time travel to find the end of it.

Yo mama so fat that when she took a selfie, she needed two phones.

Yo momma so fat, I took a photo of her last year and it's still printing.

Son: What's for dinner tonight?

Mom: Steak!

Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?

Mom: HUNGER!

Yo mama so fat, when she jumped, I didn’t laugh, but the floor cracked up.

Your mum is so cute that I asked for her number and she said yes, and now we're dating.

Your mum is so fat, when she reached for the remote, when she found it, it was crushed.

If a fly loses its wings, is it now a walk? Wait a minute, I found out a mind blower. So the 🌎 is the 3rd planet from the sun, doesn't that mean all countries are called the 3rd country of 🌎? If I get 10 likes, I'll do one mind-blowing fact daily.

Your family is so poor, when you knocked on the door for money, I offered you a penny, and when you knocked again, the rock answered and knocked you out.

Your mum is so fat, all her relationships are long distance.

Your mum is so overdue on eBay for £2 so she could get a male stripper.

Your mum is so fat, when I see her, I get depressed.

Yo mama so ugly, that when Santa came down the chimney he said, "Ho, ho- HOLY SHIT!"

I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.

A teacher wanted to sing, so she did. This is what she said:

"You have no family, even though you're broker than me."

Your mama so fat that when Thanos snapped his finger, it only got rid of weight.