Smear jokes

Keep smearing that make-up around your face, maybe you'll get somewhere with it.

I spent 10 hours applying makeup so I could look pretty when I was going to have sex with my partner.

I needn't have bothered.

The next day, it was smeared all over my face.

What do you call Jan[uary] 6th?

White people smearing shit on the walls of the capitol!

What is it called when the gynecologist slanders your grandfather?

A pap smear.

Is it just me, or when you wipe your ass too deep, it reminds you of your uncle? Just me?

When you accidentally wipe a little too hard and your finger goes up your bumhole, triggering flashbacks of when you were 10 and your uncle stayed a few weeks. 😂

What is smegma name?

One time I was at home alone with my dawgy, and I was eating peanut butter. I thought since it's oily, I could use it as a lotion, so I spread it all over my private part. My dawgy came over and started licking the peanut butter off my private part, and my private part got big and hard. Then, white stuff came out of my wee wee, and my dawgy started looking up at me and whining.

And then my daddy came home and saw what I was doing and shouted, "What are you doing?" And I said I was using peanut butter on my private part. Then he said, "Well, let me have a taste." And then he started doing what my dawgy was doing.

Bro, tampons look like sperms, and they go up your coochie.