Reprimand jokes

I have to say that Halloween is my favorite day...

Every time they see me, kids and mothers run away...

I don’t have a costume so please don’t reprimand...

When I open up the door, I’ve got my penis in my hand.

Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprimand the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said, “Johnny, when I was a little girl, I was told if I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that.”

Little Johnny looked up and replied, “Well, Ms Smith, you can’t say you weren’t warned!”

"Bill, never do that again."

"I know that everyone is allowed to act stupid once in a while, but you’re really abusing that privilege."

Boss: You're fired.

Me: *pauses porn* Why?

You're not completely useless. You can always be used as a bad example.

Today I got a lecture from my mother, and congratulated her. Why?

Because she managed not to damage me in a physical fashion.

Hi, I am just wondering who went into my account, 'cause I've changed my password, by the way.