Personal experience jokes
"Oh, you’re still talking? I thought background noise was supposed to fade out after a while. Must be tough waking up every day knowing your personality was a failed experiment."
Things I would’ve missed if my suicide attempt didn’t fail in 2020.
My attempt in 2021.
And my attempt this year.
There is nothing funnier than my life. (Evan 2020)
Me and a person downtown.
Person: Hey, crazy Saturday night.
Me: I guess so.
Person: Why do people do crazy stuff like this?
Me: I don't know. I used to, but don't anymore.
Person: Why'd you stop?
Me: Unfortunately, I lived every time I'd try something.
Sell PC.
Go to Croatia.
Try to fly to the US to meet female.
US won't let me in.
End up in Norway.
Female leaves me.
Female gets arrested by feds.
Feds read all my messages and see my dick pics.
Just another day in the defib life.
Hello! I'm Taylor, and this is my life story with me and my ex girl. So when I was little, I met this girl. Her name was Leah. We were besties for a while until I turned 13. Then I asked if she wanted to date me. She said yes!
But one day, in the middle of school, she was talking to another man!!!!!!! AND THEY HUGGED AND KISSED EACH OTHER ON THE CHEEK!!!!!! Then, she told me she hated me. I was so upset!!!!!!!! Whatever you do, don't follow the ugly rat!!!!!!!!! <3
Hi guys, so today I am going to do another blog. It's just for fun, and yeah. Enjoy!
So, this morning, when I woke up, I heard that I was getting new grips. I was so excited. (In case you guys don't know what grips are, they are sort of like gloves that go on your hands and they are for gymnastics bars.) I was excited because my old grips don't fit me anymore and my coach was like, "Oh I can get you some new ones since we have a meet in a week." And so I was like, "Oh, that's fine. My parents ordered me some. Thank you though." And she was like, "Okay, that's fine. Just make sure you have them by next week." So long story short, I have new grips now.
In 2001, my parents took me to 9/11. I was soaring towards it with excitement!
Don't do suicide shit. Nearly killed me, tbh. 🙏🙏🙏🙏
My memes are ironic, but my depression is chronic.
I got in touch with my inner self today, it's the last time I use 1-ply toilet roll.
Community talk
me when I get to pinch an 1883 penny as a Jew: ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::])
List of people who I've identified really really badly. First off we got Mal, thought she said she was transgender after out first convo Then we got JKW who I thought wqs a bloke and is apparently a girl, but I'm not sure if I still believe this or not, that was like for atleast 2 months. Then Seth I straight new for about 6 months before I found they were a girl. Yeah, even through photo and stuff I didn't realise t… Read more
Let's say, hypothetically, I'm a Barbie girl. Okay, let's even say, I'm in a Barbie World. Right, so in this scenario, I would obviously know from personal experience that life in plastic is fantastic. Therefore, it is of utmost importance that I am a Barbie girl who is indeed, in a Barbie World.