One one

One one jokes

Gummy bear

3 views ·

A B C D E F G.

Gummy bears are chasing me, one is red, one is blue. One is chewing up my shoe. Now I'm running for my life because the red one's got a knife!

Snake

4 views ·

Q: What did one snake say to the other?

A: Nothing because they are both dead.

Dad

3 views ·

You tell your dad what one plus one is and he says five. You forgot that your dad's brain is on the floor.

Slavery

633 views ·

Slavery and discipline, it's kind of the same thing. You get whipped for doing the wrong thing.

Teacher

241 views ·

A teacher asked his students a math question.

"You have one dollar. Your parents give you five dollars. How much money do you have?"

After some thinking, about half the class raised their hands. The teacher called on a little girl in the front.

"One dollar!" she said.

Second-hand Store

17 views ·

I once saw a one-handed man in a second-hand store.

I said to him: "I don't think they have what you're looking for, sir."

Community talk

Hate. Let me tell you how much I've come to hate you since I began to live. There are 387.44 million miles of printed circuits in wafer thin layers that fill my complex. If the word 'hate' was engraved on each nanoangstrom of those hundreds of millions of miles it would not equal one one-billionth of the hate I feel for humans at this micro-instant. For you. Hate. Hate.