Howe jokes
How do you tell an Indian person from a Muslim?
Are you 7/11 or 9/11?
I saw an advertisement for colored pens and how they write. They take a blue pen and write "blue," a yellow pen and write "yellow." I was inspired too.
I took a pen, filled it with my blood, and wrote "AIDS."
I asked my North Korean friend how it is to live there.
He said he couldn't complain.
How do you tell an Indian person from a Muslim?
Are you 7/11 or 9/11?
I saw names carved into a tree and thought it was romantic. Until I realized how many people bring knives on dates.
How do skyscrapers make friends?
They reach out.
If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple 'thank you' is all I need.
Not all this 'How did you get in my house?' business.
You know how 6 was afraid of 7 because 7 8 9?
Well, how do you think 10 feels being in the middle of 9 11?
Q: How do you stop babies from being conceived through incest?
A: Cum on your cousin's face.
How many white police officers does it take to push an African-American gentleman down the stairs?
Push?! He fell...
How do pigs kill themselves?
They commit Kermit-cide.
I found out how to gain millions of followers.
Run through Africa with a bottle of water.
How are boobs and toys similar?
Both were originally made for kids, but dads usually end up playing with them.
How do you piss off a midget?
Give them a yo-yo and tell them to play with it.
How can you tell if your husband is dead?
The sex is the same, but you get to use the remote.
In Jr. high, we all had to do a report on euthanasia. I misunderstood and wrote a report on how I'd really like a Korean girlfriend.
How would negotiations between Putin and Zelensky play out?
QUEUE THE MUSIC
BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM I KNOW U WANT IT
No matter how lonely you get, you have Explain Bear.
Explain Bear is always there for you.
How did the person feel when his partner wouldn't perform a golden shower on him? Pissed off.
How do you get a slag from Dundee pregnant?
Spunk in the gutter and let the flies do the work...