DoS jokes
Three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate because it's lunchtime. The guys ask the man to do a favor, and he says, "Sorry guys, I have a lot on my plate!"
Why do Indian men marry fat women?
How do Asian people name their children?
They throw a pan down the stairs.
What would your name be? Msg it to @chelsearosegraham.
Dang, it got ketchup on my sleeve. What do I do?
Spread the love!
What do you call a fish with no legs?
Fsh have no legs.
What do you do with legs?
Fsh have no legs.
What do you do with legs?
Break!
Just walked in on my parents doing it! Worst 30 minutes of my life.
What do you call a creepy flower? A Pedel-File!
I have a ton of work to do... A skele-TON.
I did phone sex, but I'll never do it again because last time my penis got stuck in the charging cord.
If Stephen Hawking is dying, where do I take him, Currys PC World, or a hospital?
What type of flour do you buy an orphan? Self-raising.
Why do I only date orphans?
Because they never have daddy issues.
How do you make holy water?
You take it to church ⛪️
How did you get Sally into a blender?
- Without much resistance.
How do you get Sally out of a blender?
- Tortilla chips.
What do McDonald's and priests have in common?
They both stick their meat in 10 year old buns.
What do you think is going through kids' heads during school shootings? Bullets.
Person A: Where do you come from?
Person B: Liberia.
Person A: *speaks softer* Oh sorry, do you come from?
What do you call a feminine cow?
A dairy queen.
What do you call an orphan's family tree? A stump.
What do you call cringe?
You.