DoS jokes
What do you call a train that carries bubblegum?
Chew-chew train! Hee hee!
A father and his young son go to a restaurant and to keep him occupied, he gives the boy three pennies to play with. Suddenly, the boy starts choking and his face starts turning blue! The father realizes the boy has swallowed the pennies and starts slapping him on the back.
The boy coughs up two of the pennies, but keeps choking.
Looking at his son, panicking, the father starts shouting for help.
A well dressed, serious looking woman, in a blue business suit is sitting at a nearby table reading from her laptop and sipping a cup of coffee.
At the sound of the commotion, she looks up, puts her coffee cup down, gets up from her seat and makes her way, unhurried, across the restaurant.
Reaching the boy, the woman carefully drops his pants, takes hold of the boy’s testicles and starts to squeeze and twist, gently at first and then ever so firmly.
After a few seconds the boy convulses violently and coughs up the last penny, which the woman deftly catches in her free hand.
Releasing the boy’s testicles, the woman walks back to her seat at the coffee bar without saying a word, but keeps the penny.
As soon as he is sure that his son has suffered no ill effects, the father rushes over to the woman and starts thanking her saying, “I’ve never seen anybody do anything like that before, it was fantastic. Are you a doctor?”
“No,” the woman replied. “I’m with the Internal Revenue Service.”
What do you call a skeleton's erection?
A boner.
What do people have a shot at when it comes to love? Shooting them in the heart.
Deku: Hey, Todoroki?
Shoto: Wht?
Deku: I just found out on the news that your dad froze to death. Do you know who did it?
Shoto: :)
What do you (anyone) and a joke not have in common?
Jokes have meanings.
What do babies and grenades have in common? They both make noise when you throw them.
What do you call a group of depressed teenagers? The Suicide Squad.
What do you call a white person having a seizure?
A vanilla shake.
Alya, do you have Discord?
What did they do with his body when he died?
They made him into Lego so kids can play with him for once.
Hi guys, I feel forgotten lol. I feel like a banana peel... no one will talk to me. Oh, I got a good idea! We do a Google Meet!
Do you ever wonder why orphans buy small cereal boxes? It's because they can't get family size.
What do orphans and apples not have in common? Apples get picked.
Child: *drinking milk*
Farmer: Hey, what are you doing?
Child: Oh, I just milked one of your cows.
Farmer: We don't have any cows, we only have bulls.
Child: *realizes*
Do you know who Helen Keller is?
Neither did she.
When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"
What do dino nuggies and the brown M&M have in common?
I want to fuck them both.
What do you call an orphan?
An orphan.
What do the twin towers and genders have in common? There used to be two, now they're a sensitive topic.