DoS jokes
A guy gives labor to a baby girl and a boy twins. The doctor said but the lady was like,
"Ugh, why do I need my husband to be in labor and I want a girl, not a boy, just a girl!"
The lady passed out 😵 and then found out she was in a coma. The man who was in labor died. The two babies got a nanny, an evil one. The nanny killed the babies on their first birthday.
How do Ephippians celebrate their kids' first birthday?
Put a flower on their gravestone.
Armless guy: Even though I don’t have arms, I can do anything you normal people can do.
Me: 🎵If you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands! 🎶
Where do you bring a canoe that doesn’t feel good?... The boat dock.
Do you want to know how the NY Jets got their name?
What do you call a selfie that an orphan takes?
A family picture.
What do you call a cow that can't milk?
A failure!
I think your hairline might have the hiccups.
Answer to it: You might have to give it a wash in the shower.
A big guy told the small guy, "Do you want a little pill because you look ill, or should I smash you?"
What do you call an orphan who likes football?
Because someone will actually give him something.
Me: How do you say yes in Spanish? You: Si. Me: Si if these nuts fit in your mouth.
What do you call a rich orphan?
Batman.
Why do orphans commit crimes?
Because they want to be wanted.
What do you call a photo of an orphan who takes a selfie?
A family portrait.
What do guns and gum have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
What do you call a family photo with an orphan?
A selfie.
What flour do you buy an orphan?
Self-raising flour.
Why do orphans use Samsung?
Because iPhones have home buttons.
If you have a pair and it runs around the street, what do you call it? A running pair.
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?
Frostbite.