Do jokes
What do you call an autistic ant? An Evelyn.
Why do orphans love Oreos?
Because when they have a family pack, they can eat it all!
What do a brand new house, me, and new jewelry box have in common?
We're all empty on the inside.
I was having issues in my personal and professional life. I hated everyone. I was on the brink of a mental breakdown and depression. I decided to see a therapist about it. The therapist suggested that I should write letters to the people I hate and then burn them. I must admit I feel much better...
But now I don't know what to do with the letters.
Your hairline is so ugly, even Dora the Explorer can’t even do it.
What games do orphans hate?
Bingo.
Q: What movie do emos relate the most to?
A: Suicide Squad.
What do you call a guy in a wheelchair that walks into a fire?
Hot Wheels.
What do tomatoes 🍅 learn to do in a race?
Ketchup!
Life isn't about pleasing yourself and that you have to do things for the sole benefit of God.
It’s like masturbation. Sometimes it’s not getting yourself off, but getting someone else off too. That’s what thighjobs are for.
What do trans women bring to lesbian relationships?
Something big and warm 🍆.
What do you call a gay Megalodon?
Magalogay.
Her husband prepares them a romantic dinner. The wife tells her husband about her desire for it. The husband was clueless about such acts. So, the wife tells him to strip naked on the couch and lay underneath her naked in the reverse missionary position.
She starts thrusting with his meat inside of her and starts waiting for him to thrust along with her thrusts. However, the husband didn’t know what to do, so he just laid there. Suddenly the wife had an urge to pee, but held it in because her husband’s joystick was right inside her. She loses control after a while and lets one drip out. The wife apologizes profusely and continues thrusting her husband. A couple of minutes later, she feels the urge again and lets another drip of urine run down the husband’s schlong to his pelvis.
The husband throws the wife from the couch, gets up, and says,
"Honey, if you think I’ll be screwed by you for more of that, you’re out of your mind."
Why do orphans have cereal with water? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call an orphan village?
An orphanage.
What do the Mafia and pussies have in common?
One slip of the tongue, and you’re in deep shit.
Vegan Teacher the musical.
Miss Kadie - "Oh no, you poor dead animal!"
Mr. Beast- 🎶 "You're a dumb Communist, Miss Kadie" 🎶
Chandler-🎵 "Yup, you're one high fluting son of a gun" 🎵
Mr. Beast- 🎵 "I just gobbled up a quadruple patty from my restaurant" 🎵
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "Don't hurt animals kids, do you want to be a vegans 'R' us kid?" 🎵
Kids- 🎵 "We've had enough of your problems, Miss Kadie, you're such a commie!"
Miss Kadie - 🎵 "I just want to die because I'm so sad!"
- Miss Kadie jumps off Mr. Beast Burger and commits suicide.
What company do orphans hate the most?
S. C. Johnson, a family company.
What do you call a selfie taken by an orphan?
A family portrait.
So, at school there are these twins. At my school, I folded two paper airplanes to throw at them. Once I realized why it felt so wrong to do it, I had already threw them. I hit the north, then the south one.