Conflict resolution jokes

How do you tell the difference between a Palestinian elementary school and a terrorist training camp?

Answer... I don't know, I just fly the drone.

My roommate's diary says I have boundary issues.

I believe a lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided completely if cowboy architects had just made their towns big enough for everyone...

When someone asks you for a beef (fight), just say you're a vegetarian.

No, I don't want to fight, so I shall kill you (so we won't fight)!

Two kids were beating up a kid in an alley, so I stepped in to help. He didn’t stand a chance against the three of us.

Why do some couples make their status "single" after a small argument? Like, I don't put "orphan" after I get into an argument with my family.

When you're fighting with the emo kid and he brings his friends. Now you gotta fight the suicide squad.

Turn the comments into a kindergarten fight.

So there was this kid being bullied by four other kids. I decided to step in.

He didn’t stand a chance against the five of us.