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wait@ truephantom0, can you explain the whole situation as clearly as possible?

omg guys wait, I have an amazing idea-

I don't care what he says, or does, even if he threatens to kill you or some shit, ignore Ashton.

just to piss him off. plus he's just a bitch anyways, no point in acknowledging a bitch, right?

i'm bored anyone wanna add me on snap i'm at school right now so you'll have to wait till after

Im gonna fucking kms, why? THIS- bro im crying rn (not as a joke) here is the email I sent my mom

Uhm, remember when I gave your number to my friend? so when I pass my classes I can go over to their house? They had their number in their backpack pocket, and they were like "ADDISON IM GONNA CALL YOUR MOM" I freaked out, and I don't wanna get in trouble, so I'm apologizing now, instead of waiting until get home, and they called you about planned pregnancy, and I took the phone out of their hands and tried hanging up, but it didn't work, and I'm sorry. please don't me mad.

and I'm crying so hard rn ima kms

SHREK

Written by

William Steig & Ted Elliott

SHREK Once upon a time there was a lovely princess. But she had an enchantment upon her of a fearful sort which could only be broken by love's first kiss. … Read more

GENESIS 8 1But God remembered Noah and all the wild animals and the livestock that were with him in the ark, and he sent a wind over the earth, and the waters receded. 2Now the springs of the deep and the floodgates of the heavens had been closed, and the rain had stopped falling from the sky. 3The water receded steadily from the earth. At the end of the hundred and fifty days the water had gone down, 4and on the sev… Read more

I am the one, don't weigh a ton Don't need a gun to get respect up on the street (okay) Under the sun, the bastard son Will pop the Glock to feed himself and family (sheesh) By any means, your enemies my enemies We wet them up like a canteen (damn) The yellow tape surrounds the fate Don't have a face so now you late, open the gates

Great, eliminate like ElimiDate (woo) Hey, young boy had to penetrate (ooh) Face, you… Read more

(Reposting cause I wasn’t in my acc)

ALRIGHT homies we’re gonna do a thing! I’ll write a sentence, then everyone else continue the story in the comments. ONE SENTENCE AT A TIME!!!

You’re welcome to do as many as you want, but wait for at least one person to add to it before you do. Anything goes, so you can literally make the next sentence WHATEVER you want (as long as it makes some sense with the story). Have fun!

Here’s how it starts: “Long ago lived a silly turtle, happily living in a pond.

(I expect this to be a fully fledged story by the time I check back)

ALRIGHT homies we’re gonna do a thing! I’ll write a sentence, then everyone else continue the story in the comments. ONE SENTENCE AT A TIME!!!

You’re welcome to do as many as you want, but wait for at least one person to add to it before you do. Anything goes, so you can literally make the next sentence WHATEVER you want (as long as it makes some sense with the story). Have fun!

Here’s how it starts: “Long ago lived a silly turtle, happily living in a pond.”

This is completely a waist of time, but worth it at the same time.

*Dad's sitting on the couch reading news paper when wife walks in*

Husband: "This music.. Is the final boss coming? Or worse.. It's my wife..."

Wife: "You jobless monkey... Money to pay bills doesn't grow on tree's"

Husband: "Well it's no my fault.. And I was born poor *Over it* If I was son of Bill Gates I'd bathe in money.."

Wife: "First go bat… Read more

Anonymous vent to u strangers: I’m in a relationship i havent been truly happy in for a while. If i attempt to split she’ll blame herself and her own insecurities, and possibly resort to harming herself. She clearly thinks a lot of me but she just isnt ready for a serious relationship and it shows almost weekly. I’m keeping her around in hopes it gets better but less and less do i see a way she becomes worth any waiting... 🙃 fuck man

Little Sara, you're a diamond in the rough And I know that you don't hear this all enough And I'm sure that's why your wrists have tons of cuts And I'm sure that's why you think you're not enough On your nineteenth birthday you thought that you were done Tons of people in your home, but it only felt like one 'Cause your brain can only think about the waiting loaded gun But your friends are all still here, so pretend … Read more

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhok wait im not done ahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahaha

Now the moment you've all been waiting for: ROUND 5: 1+4=5 2+5=12 3+6=21 8+11=? Correct answer is 50 points, if this is too easy, they'll be a bonus round. Catch y'all in the comments!