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GENESIS 26 Isaac and Abimelek 1Now there was a famine in the land—besides the previous famine in Abraham’s time—and Isaac went to Abimelek king of the Philistines in Gerar. 2The Lord appeared to Isaac and said, “Do not go down to Egypt; live in the land where I tell you to live. 3Stay in this land for a while, and I will be with you and will bless you. For to you and your descendants I will give all these lands and w… Read more

GENESIS 24 Isaac and Rebekah 1Abraham was now very old, and the Lord had blessed him in every way. 2He said to the senior servant in his household, the one in charge of all that he had, “Put your hand under my thigh. 3I want you to swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and the God of earth, that you will not get a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I am living, 4but will go to my country … Read more

Bee Movie Script

According to all known laws of aviation,

there is no way a bee should be able to fly.

Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.

The bee, of course, flies anyway

because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.

Barry! Breakfast is ready!

Ooming!

Hang… Read more

GENESIS 22 Abraham Tested 1Some time later God tested Abraham. He said to him, “Abraham!” “Here I am,” he replied. 2Then God said, “Take your son, your only son, whom you love—Isaac—and go to the region of Moriah. Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on a mountain I will show you.” 3Early the next morning Abraham got up and loaded his donkey. He took with him two of his servants and his son Isaac. When he had cut … Read more

GENESIS 20 Abraham and Abimelek 1Now Abraham moved on from there into the region of the Negev and lived between Kadesh and Shur. For a while he stayed in Gerar, 2and there Abraham said of his wife Sarah, “She is my sister.” Then Abimelek king of Gerar sent for Sarah and took her. 3But God came to Abimelek in a dream one night and said to him, “You are as good as dead because of the woman you have taken; she is a marr… Read more

GENESIS 18 The Three Visitors 1The Lord appeared to Abraham near the great trees of Mamre while he was sitting at the entrance to his tent in the heat of the day. 2Abraham looked up and saw three men standing nearby. When he saw them, he hurried from the entrance of his tent to meet them and bowed low to the ground. 3He said, “If I have found favor in your eyes, my lord, do not pass your servant by. 4Let a little wat… Read more

GENESIS 17 The Covenant of Circumcision 1When Abram was ninety-nine years old, the Lord appeared to him and said, “I am God Almighty; walk before me faithfully and be blameless. 2Then I will make my covenant between me and you and will greatly increase your numbers.” 3Abram fell facedown, and God said to him, 4“As for me, this is my covenant with you: You will be the father of many nations. 5No longer will you be cal… Read more

You're so fat that when you got on the scales they said "I need your weight not your phone number" ​ ​ ​ You're so fat that an oragami crane has less folds than you. ​ ​ ​ You are so fat that when you wear a yellow raincoat people shout out "taxi" ​ ​ ​ You're so fat, the photo I took of you last christmas is still printing.

You're so fat that when you want to iron your pants, you have to go out to your driveway. ​ … Read more

Damn people sure are hating Ashton, I find that a but funny because I think he was actually worse before and has gotten better. It may be because I’m not in as much anymore but I haven't seen him hit on anybody since, well almost a year ago

Happy New Years everybody, I’m sure some of you are used to seeing big balls drop. 🙃

It's not even morning I got breakfast on my mind I need a number two, a number four, two number 9s And can you add a sausage, egg and cheese with hash browns on the side My boy Paulo want an orange juice But he said he don't want ice (No ice) Can I put some grape jelly in the bag that would be nice And I think I want some hotcakes can you make it 405 Can I add a chicken biscuit make sure that it's freshly fried And S… Read more

This is a big problem guys. You all realize that most of the people here haven't told you their name, and yet people are getting crushes for some strange reason. Sure, there are cute people here, but you forget that they live in completly different places. Unless your willing to risk it all by traveling to where they live, it's pointless.

Guys I think I have some bad news about Hailey and Caitlyn. As you might have noticed, Hailey hasn’t been on at all today. Caitlyn and I think her parents found out about her discord as well as her acc on here. Cat’s been trying to message her all day but we haven’t heard anything, and I haven’t heard anything from Cat in hours. Now her profile seems to have undergone the same fate as Hailey’s, so it’s possible the same thing happened to her. I’m not entirely sure what’s going on, but I don’t think it’s good. Wish them luck.

Hey Matt, I’m not sure when or even if you’ll see this, but I wanted to talk about something I’ve been thinking about for a while. I’m not one to ask for things like this, but at this point I think it’s necessary. I’d like to request moderator status. As you might have seen, things have been...not ideal lately, to say the least. There’s hackers, bullies, etc., all over the place. I do my best to try and settle things down around here, but words can only go so far. If it’s alright with you, I’d like to become a mod so I can do a better job at helping people on here. Thanks.

USERS OF WORST JOKES EVER!!! I have a very pleasant announcement to make! Myself and Dagger, in honor of his helpfulness and Chad Energy, have crowned《 rmk 》the third Chad King of WJE. Treat him just as you would Dagger and myself. He will be aiding us in spreading Chadness all throughout the site, so be sure to congratulate him for his new title.

GENESIS 6 Wickedness in the World 1When human beings began to increase in number on the earth and daughters were born to them, 2the sons of God saw that the daughters of humans were beautiful, and they married any of them they chose. 3Then the Lord said, “My Spirit will not contend with humans forever, for they are mortal; their days will be a hundred and twenty years.” 4The Nephilim were on the earth in those days—a… Read more

some of u people are so mean whoever made this website needs to be nicer and make sure the jokes are funny not mean and hurtful in fact I am adopted and I went to the jokes about that but they were ruthless instead of funny and I think some of u should listen to k-love 94.1 or 89.3 and then read the bible start w/Matthew then ask God into your life

People are probably blaming me for making Hailey leave. But I never meant for this to happen. If people don't know, it all started from one of my harmless feminism jokes, when she and her friends started to talk shit about it and me. Sure, I said some stuff that I regret (and I did say sorry for them), but I was trying to stop this bullshit. Whenever they made insulting posts and comments, I would ignore or respond c… Read more