Are jokes

Quote of the day: It's never too late to be what you wished you were.

Hope y'all are having a great day! I just got back from a volleyball tournament that I had to be up at 5 AM for! We played three games and won the last one. We advanced and are playing a few more tomorrow. Wish me and my team good luck!

Why are Americans so good at solving Rubik’s cubes?

Because they have a history of separating colors.

Your arms are open. They stretch towards me, Reaching, grabbing, pulling me, Surrounding me, Drowning me in my helplessness. Time standing still, inside here. Looking through windows, time passing by. Let me go, will ya?

I crashed into the back of a car at the lights today.

A really short guy got out of it and said, “I’m not happy.”

I said, “Well, which one are you then?”

On April Fool's, go to an orphanage and tell them that their parents are here to pick them up.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, All the worse jokes come from you.

One person said you are much more beautiful than Cinderella. The next day, you're in court and Cinderella is the witness.

(P.S. she was born to be a drama queen.)

Whenever a woman files a rape accusation, it’s obviously fake. Even the cows at my farm are more likely, at least they aren’t flat.

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