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According to all known laws of aviation,

there is no way a bee should be able to fly.

Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground.

The bee, of course, flies anyway

because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little.

Barry! Breakfast is ready!

Coming!

Hang on a second.

Hello?

- Barry? - Adam?

- Can you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up.

Looking sharp.

Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those.

Sorry. I'm excited.

Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son.

A perfect report card, all B's.

Very proud.

Ma! I got a thing going here.

- You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me!

- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye!

Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house!

  • 6

    • Every single person on the plane died except for 2. How is that possible?

    It said all the single people died; the 2 were a couple. That's how it was possible.

    Why did your friend eat the burger?

    Because he wanted to murder all burgers and was starting with this one!

    Not really. He was just hungry.

    An ugly man with a gun walks into a bar. He sees a woman and falls in love with her.

    Man: "Hey, cute lady!"

    Woman: "Leave me alone, you ugly two-faced man! I already have a boyfriend."

    Man: "Not for long!"

    And then the man shoots the woman's boyfriend.

    Woman: "How dare you murder such a beautiful man!"

    Man: "Now you shall be my girlfriend."

    Woman: "Never."

    And then the man takes the seat that the woman's boyfriend was sitting in before.

    Man: "You look like a dream."

    Woman: "Then open up your ugly eyes and stop sleeping, murder."

    Man: "What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the world, compared to all those ugly women? Bleuch!"

    Woman: "What's it like being the ugliest mother f***ing murder in the world, compared to all those beautiful men?"

    And then the man orders flowers and candy.

    Bartender: "We don't serve flowers, or candy."

    And the man shoots the bartender.

    Another man can't believe what he just saw, so he strangles the first man and throws him out.

    There were ten cats in a boat, and one jumped out. How many were left?

    None, 'cause they are all copycats.

    A man gets kicked out of police camp after writing "Who's that Pokémon?" next to all of the chalk outlines.

    I never wanted to believe that my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.

    But when I got home, all the signs were there.

    I can't believe I got fired at the calendar factory. I mean... all I did was take a day off!

    What is a vampire's favorite animal? A giraffe.

    What is a vampire's favorite fruit? Neck-tarines.

    Those two jokes are not funny at all!

    Why were the victims of 9/11 so mad?

    Because they ordered a pepperoni pizza, but all they got was a plane.

    Q: What do women and KFC have in common?

    A: Once you eat the breasts and thighs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.

    A lawyer bought a beautiful yacht. He invited the law firm to come aboard for a great weekend.

    Saturday night was the candle light dinner and Sam drank too much, walked on the deck and fell over the rail into the water and was calling for help. Tom said, "Oh no, the sharks will get him." All of the party lined along the rail and noticed the sharks were swimming around him in a circle. Jim said, "The sharks are not even bothering him!" And a shark lifted up his head out of the water and said, "Professional Courtesy."

    I met this kid and he was being bullied by 9 people. I Asked 1 whats going on. They all said another one to bully they all tried hitting me and then my mates which was like 15 of them came in and it was like war all over again.

    Where do you think all the orphans went?

    In the World Trade Center, I trapped them in so they can finally get to their parents.

    There were 10 cats on a boat. 1 jumped off. How many were left? I DO NOT KNOW.

    There was none left. They were all a bunch of copycats.