My gay ass: I want to find Jesus.
Religious mom: FINALLY!
Me: Grabs a noose.
SP1D3R
I'm gonna eat a hell of a lot of popcorn kernels before I die just to make the cremation a little more interesting.
I'm Pastor Moe Mister, Moe Lester.
Grandma: When we go to a wedding, whispers, "You're next."
At a funeral, I whisper, "You're next."
Damn, that beat dropped harder than my grandma falling down the stairs.
U mess with goose, he strain out all of your body juice.
U mess with goose, he hang u with noose.