How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her?
They gave her a cheese grater and told her it was a book
Shower thoughts
used to laugh at Michael Jackson for wearing gloves and a mask.....
Yet here i am, stuck at home in this covid19 Thriller, Beating it.....
Roses are red, potato chips are savory...
The United States prison system is legalized slavery.
I wanted to tell a joke about Jonestown
But the punch line is too long
What would Bill Cosby be if he was white
Innocent
When you find out your wife had a miscarriage
So you start singing it’s the best day ever
Science can fly you to the moon, but religion flies you into skyscrapers.
Why don't orphans get offended by dark humour? Because it can't hit home
Welcome to Dave’s orphanage. You make it, we take it.
What is the difference between a hipster and a hockey player? A hockey player showers.
To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos. Then I made pizza because they do not live in a swing state.
Why did Joe Biden pull out of the Afghanistan war?
Because it was over 18 years old
Jesus tried solving the rubik cube but died on the cross
What do you call an anorexic bitch with a yeast infection A quarter pounder with cheese
When does a cub become a Boy Scout When he eats his first brownie
What’s the difference between erotic and kinky Erotic is usually a feather kinky is using the whole chicken