How is slavery different from Pokémon?
The types you can have.
Shower thoughts
I heard Steven Spielberg is coming out with a new movie about fat people called E.C.
(Extra Cholesterol)
A buddy and I checked out some books from a local library. When we returned them, he said, "Your sister works the returns, right?" I told him, "Yes, she does, and she will be here in about five minutes." He said, "Why don’t we put a cookbook in the women’s sports section?" I told him, "I love it!" So I picked out a Reese Witherspoon book.
What show does an orphan hate?
Family Guy.
When ur fighting with the emo kid and he brings his friends. Now u gotta fight the suicide squd
Where did Jeffrey Epstein go to college?
Bring them young.
What did Tupac's homies smoke? His ashes.
It would've been too tacky to take a shot in his memory.
What is the difference between Bill Cosby and a rap artist?
The word "art."
Why were the rappers late for their flight?
They forgot to pack.
Who is my favorite underground rapper?
XXX Tentacion
Did you hear Palpatine is sewing Nike?
Stole his slogan, just do it!
How did Anakin get away with cheating?
By choking on his wife!
What does Yoda say when he’s at the strip club?
"Dirty bitch, you are."
What do a small pair of underpants and a small dance room have in common?
No ballroom.
I was at a train station and a woman ran up to me and asked, "Is this train running on time?" I said, "No, it runs on steam and coal."
I arrived at a restaurant early and the manager said, "Do you mind waiting a bit?" I said, "I don’t mind," and he said, "OK. Take these trays to table 9."
What do you call a gender neutral person who is lactose intolerant non-bi dairy?
Yesterday I purchased a world map and told my wife to throw a dart, and wherever it lands, I will take her. Turns out we're spending three weeks behind the fridge.
My brother is ugly. One time he stuck his head out the window. The police arrested for mooning.
My proctologist used to be a photographer. He took x-rays and told me to bend over and say "cheese!"