Shower thoughts

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One day, little Johnny woke up to get a drink of water. He passed by his parents' bedroom and noticed sheets bouncing. He asked his dad what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." Little Johnny said, "Who is your partner?" Dad said, "Your mom." On his way up, he passed by his sister's room and noticed sheets bouncing around and asked what she’s doing. She said, "Playing cards with my boyfriend, Paul." The next day, Dad came to ask Johnny a question. The father noticed Johnny was still in bed and asked him what he was doing. He saw the sheet bouncing and asked Johnny what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." His dad asked him who his partner was. Little Johnny said, "You don’t need a partner if you have a good hand."

The top worst thing for an orphan, and probably the most awkward one, is when they're having sex and the other person is calling them mommy or daddy

Yesterday I was fucking my sister and she said' you fuck a lot like dad I said "really mum said that too."

Why'd Biden get fired from the supermarket?

He kept telling little kids they smell like freshly baked bread.

What does Cangaball do after eating its vegetables?

Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.

I took my 5 year old son to ride some roller coasters. I think he didn’t like it because I challenged him to a no hands contest.

He said, "But I don’t have any." He wanted to know what dark humor is. Now he knows what it is and what it feels like.

Don't be racist! BE LIKE MARIO!

He's an Italian plumber Created by the Japanese Who speaks English And looks like a Mexican Jumps like a black man And grabs coins like a Jew