Bully: Hey virgin!
Victim: I'm not a virgin, just ask your sister.
Bully: I don't have a sister, dumbass.
Victim: Just wait nine months.
shaylie lol
hi im back
add my snap-shayliehamilton
How many babies does it take to paint a wall?
Depends on how hard you throw it.
Like if you hate going to school.
A news headline read: "A toddler has shot a person every week in the US for two years straight."
He was in the infantry.
Hoes be like, "I've been through a lot."
No, a lot's been through you.
I went to a butcher house with my little cousin and saw a baby pig and told her, "Look, it's Pepa Pig!"
She started crying.
A guy goes ice fishing for the very first time. All of a sudden, he hears a voice. “There are no fish under the ice!”
He ignores it and moves to another area, cuts a hole, and tosses his line in. Again, he hears the booming voice: “There are no fish under the ice!”
He nervously looks up and asks, “Lord? Is that you?”
“No, this is the rink manager!”
The Stigg is a joke.
How do you tell if a blond is really stupid?
Put a scratch and sniff on a bleach pod.
Omnom.
Two pirates, Morty and Sol, meet in a bar. Sol has a patch over one eye, a hook for a hand, and a wooden peg leg. “Ye gads, matey,” says Morty. “What happened to ya?” Sol says, “Me pirate ship was attacked, and a lucky shot lopped off me leg. So now I got me a wooden peg.”
“And yer hand?” asks Marty.
“When me ship sank, a shark bit me hand off. So now I got me a hook.”
“OK, but what’s with the eye patch?”
“I was standin’ on a dock, and the biggest seagull I ever saw poops right in me eye.”
“But ya don’t go blind from no seagull poop.”
“True,” says Sol. “But it was me first day with the hook.”
If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world.
Hears a clean joke: My horse got muddy, so I gave him a bubble bath.
Now hears a dirty joke: Bubbles is the horse next door.
biden
My brother when he sees a girl.
When I finished high school, I wanted to take my graduation money and buy myself a motorcycle, but my mom said no.
See, she had a brother who died in a horrible motorcycle accident when he was eighteen, and I could just have his motorcycle.
Don't believe what your school bully tells you.
Always take it with a grain of assault.
How many skinheads does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
10; 1 to do it and 9 to back him up.
When your brother sends you to go get a box of condoms for his b-day. (* *)
i am a joke