Have you ever tried Ethiopian food?
Neither have they.
GG Miller
If you're that depressed, reach out to someone. And remember, suicide is a permanent solution.
What’s the difference between a fetus and a jar of pickles?
The pickles aren’t as tasty in a jar.
I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was just a kid.
Say what you will about pedophiles. At least they drive slowly through school zones.
What’s the first thing you should do if an epileptic is having a seizure in the bathtub?
Throw in your dirty laundry!
A man went into a library and asked for a book on how to commit suicide. The librarian said:
"F*ck off! You won’t bring it back."
I dated a girl, and I didn’t know she was previously in an abusive relationship.
I thought she just REALLY hated high-fives.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims – they went 89 stories in ten seconds.
Dark humor is like food. Not everyone gets it.
Don't challenge Death to a pillow fight.
Unless you’re prepared for the reaper cushion.
A man wakes from a coma. His wife changes out of her black clothes and, irritated, remarks, “I really cannot depend on you in anything, can I!”
I just got my doctor's test results and I'm really upset about it. Turns out, I'm not gonna be a doctor.
What is a witch's favorite subject in school?
Spelling!
What time would it be if Godzilla came to school? Time to run!
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school? Because her students were so bright.
Which school supply is king of the classroom? A ruler.
What is a snake’s favorite subject in school? Hisssssstory.
Are these real or fake
"What did the mama tomato say to the baby tomato? Catch up!"
Why did the baby strawberry cry? Because his mom was in a jam!