Kris looks like a Neanderthal, the only difference is that Neanderthals serve a purpose in HUMAN HISTORY
Yo Leo, are you an interior decorator? Because when you enter a room, it becomes EMPTY
Leo might not be the dumbest person in the world... but she’d better hope they don’t DIE
If I had a dollar for every brain cell LEO has, I’d have ONE DOLLAR
BlessedBrian’s AUTOBIOGRAPHY would be titled “The Adventure of Watching Paint Dry”
BlessedBrian, your secrets are safe with ME... because I wasn’t LISTENING when you told them
BlessedBrian’s mom’s birth certificate is a COLLECTOR’S ITEM
BlessedBrian must have been born on April Fools’ Day... because he’s a JOKE every day of the year
I would roast BlessedBrian, but it seems LIFE already did a thorough job
Don’t be racist racism is a crime and crime is for black people
My brother is ugly one time he stuck his head out the window, the police arrested for mooning
My proctologist used to be a photographer, he took x-rays and told me to bend over and say cheese
Tuesday I was looking at my family tree and two dogs were using it
When I have sex, my girlfriend screams, especially when I walk in on her
I met a fat chick at the beach. People started asking me what I use for bait. Or do you want us to help throw the Whale back in the water?
I ran into a fat woman today she said next time don’t hit me. I said I don’t think I have enough gas to go around. Then the ground start to rumble with every step she took
I complained to my dad why he never took me to the zoo. He said they want you they’ll come get you.
I just encountered a father and son moment over some milk The dad finally came back with the milk
This was a few months ago. I used to help people load and unload inventory, one day I’m driving home after having lunch with my sister, and she asked if we can stop at the next gas station,I told her so you can weigh yourself on the truck scale.
Last year, I gave my brother a BB gun for his birthday, he gave me a T-shirt with a bullseye on it. I asked him what was the bullseye for he said target practice
