We jokes

Little Johnny went on a camping trip. All the tents were taken, so he shared with the teacher. So Little Johnny says: "Can I play with your bellybutton? My mom always lets me when we camp." So the teacher says: "Sure." 5 minutes later the teacher says: "Woah, woah, woah that's not my bellybutton!" Little Johnny says: "Woah, woah, woah, that's not my finger."

Why do we not have female magicians? Because last time we had them, we burned them alive.

Once, my father came home and found me in front of a roaring fire.

That made my father very mad, as we didn't have a fireplace.

What did the hairline say to the hat?

"We go way back..."

My mom told me we were flying to a building to see my aunt. I wondered, "Are we about to relive 9/11?"

Little Johnny ran into the kitchen and asked his mother, "Mom, can little girls have babies?" His mom answered, "Of course not." A few minutes later, his mom heard him shout to his friend, "It's okay, we can keep playing!"

I asked my nan if she wouldn't mind shitting in a bucket when we went camping. She replied, "Why the fuck would I want to sit in a bucket?" So eventually she did, and I took the best shit I have ever had!

A teacher walked up to me and said, "How did we get butt cracks?"

I was like 4, so I said, "You had an earthquake on your booty."

Bootylicious lol

Somebody shouts "Fire!"

Man 1: Get the children out!

Man 2: F*** the children!

Man 3: We don't have time!

(True story)

One day Sally's mom said, "I can just eat you up!" And Sally says, "No, you can't!" Then the mom asks why and Sally says, "Because I'm a beaner, and we don't taste good."

People complain we are overpopulated.

Well, then if we committed suicide, then why do they be sad? It's one less person to think about. Why complain about it when in the end we become sad people?

Why don’t we just call blue balls a cummy ache?

We thought that my mother died in the best way possible, during her sleep.

But when we did an autopsy on her, we saw she actually died in the worst way possible. During the autopsy.

Your forehead is so big we could fit the whole alphabet on there.

What does this website with its comments and a cult have in common?

We have a case of Witzelsucht.

Why can't we see or sense kamikazes' bombs?

They're out of plane sight.

It's past April Fool's Day, and we still have a joke as president.

Did you know the F in orphan stands for family... Oh wait, haha.

We should stop making jokes about orphans before they tell their parents... Oh, continue.

Screw sister from a mister or brother from another mother. We besties from another testie.

We should stop.

Wait, but who is the orphan going to tell?

The boomerang!