The jokes
What happens when a depressed kid tries to give a tree a high five?
The tree leaves him hanging :)
What's the difference between a priest and a rapist?
My mom said the only way to cure depression is to do what she does. She's dead.
I'm sorry, but I can only process text. Please provide the joke as text.
Your mom is so fat that when she went to the dentist, the man said, "One at a time."
Kids in the backseat make accidents, but accidents in the backseat make kids.
Yo mama is so fat, she wakes up on both sides of the bed.
My homework was to watch as much porn as I can... and tell my teacher the details so he won't get in trouble for watching it during class.
Why are orphan weddings so entertaining?
They get to walk themselves down the aisle.
Welcome to the roadkill cafe, where yesterday's crash is today's cash.
What do you get if you cross diarrhea with incest?
I don't know.
Neither do I, but it runs in the family.
Why did no one turn up to John's funeral?
Because Sally wrote the invitations!
Why'd the emo have no friends?
"Because they like to hang by themself."
Why can't Asians play Baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
I was crying at school because my grandpa died. My friends asked what his last words were. I told them his last words were, "Are you still holding the ladder?"
What sounds did the Ukraine people make in basketball? Ka-boom!
Why are orphans so naughty at school? It's not like the teacher is gonna call their parents.
What do you say when a handicapped man forgets something? "He knew it like the back of his hand."
How do you starve a hippie? You hide its welfare check under the soap.
The phrase “Muslim women live in one of the hottest countries in the world and they can’t even expose their legs” has two meanings.