Suck it up jokes

I hate it when people say to suck it up... I mean, sometimes I don’t want someone’s dick in my face.

I have a big bag of Doritos in the kitchen. It's only for people who are skinny, but the fat people can't have any. All they do is suck it up like a lollipop.

Orphans are humans like everyone else, so suck it up, rude jerks!

Life is like a dick, it just gets hard for no reason.

I only have 4 moods:

• fuck this • fuck that • fuck me • fuck you

I empathize with the above, but I have an additional 4 moods to add:

• fuck yeah • fuck no • fuck my life • fuck everything

and don't forget the inevitable

• fuck it

and for those who have just given up

• fuck

This is beautiful.

What sucks but doesn't suck?

Vacuums!

How do you know when you should tell a heterosexual woman to stop sucking your dick?

When there is blood coming out of your dick instead of sperm.

Life is like giving head... it always sucks.